Sometimes when we look at the minute details, everything becomes blurry. This is why it’s important to always see the big picture, so that you’ll have a better understanding of the tiniest things it’s made of.

I like this photo. It shows how exhausted this child from the slums is. But I had second thoughts of posting it because it shows a sensitive part of her body. I blurred it just a bit to make it a bit inconspicuous.

I can choose not to publish this or submit this as an entry. But what if a photo, which poses this particular problem, is just too significant to be ignored?

Is there a rule regarding this?

I’m relatively happy. Well, I don’t even know what that is, but it sounds really good and special because of the H word. Happiness was not something I sought, because I’ve always been a happy kid. And why would you seek something you already have right? Just like whenever my cardiologists ask me if I get tired easily, it’s hard for me to tell because I’ve been born with a heart ailment and I wouldn’t know how it feels NOT to get tired easily. You’ll never know something until you have it (or not).

Now I’m not sure anymore if I’m still that happy girl I used to be. ‘Satisfied’ may be a better word to describe me. I’m satisfied with my life because God always gives me what I need. I believe God always listens to my prayers and I have many accounts on how He answered them. I even prayed for a friend and it came true right away. Maybe He’s not giving me what I want.. yet… but I’m positively sure that will come soon enough. Perhaps I’m happy now, I just don’t notice it because I seldom smile nor laugh. But it would be nice to smile and laugh again like the old days. I even want to study again, perhaps to get that satisfaction of learning something theoretically. I remember in college I always itched to graduate. Maybe I did enjoy the learning journey a little bit, and perhaps I want to go through it again.

Whatever will be, will be. I’ll windsurf to where the winds bring me. =)

~Jam

Mui Ne, Southern Viet Nam

Aetas chilling at Mt. Pinatubo

I had a great time with my old friends, but knowing the significance of the place we went to made the trip even more interesting. I just found out that Bolinao is actually the tip of the nose of Luzon. This only means that when I show you a map of the Philippines, there will be no need for me to point Bolinao because I can just describe it and you can easily locate it. Our map is shaped like a sitting living thing right? When you see the arm, you know it’s Palawan. When you see the top of the head, you think of Aparri.. further up you’re at Batanes.

Well, look at Luzon’s nose. See the upper tip? I’ve been there. Yehess haha!

Not to forget… before we went to Bolinao, we trekked to Mt. Pinatubo first. I have always wanted to go up there because I wanted to put a picture on a place that made a mark on my childhood. Reminiscing a bit, one morning in the year 1991, I opened our door and saw snow! I was very excited, but when I coughed a couple of times looking at it, I knew it was something else. My sister, who was in High School then (I think) collected some of the “snow” in small vials. Then I knew that Mt. Pinatubo, which was apparently a volcano, erupted and gave off snow, that was actually ashes we saw in our garage. I’m not sure if those ashes reached Metro Manila, but they definitely reached Bulacan.

My first summer trip this year is definitely very significant. I can’t put myself to think of a second part of the summer trip because I’m now broke. My budget for Bolinao bloated because of food and some miscellaneous expenses. I wouldn’t even have come had I known I’d be spending that much. But because it was my friend’s sort of despedida, I tried my best to go. It sucks when some people can’t come, didn’t plan to come or didn’t even came close to wanting to come or whatever, but I’m so glad I came because I was after all with very special people in my life.

Some things suck like not being able to arrive home at a time you’re expecting, but it’s better to commute at 5 in the morning than at 3am. Some of my friends and I know that some things suck too like being ambushed at payment collections — being asked to pay for something you didn’t even plan to pay for. Or doing all the things that other people can volunteer to do. Well, it’s fine of course. No trip is perfect. And nobody is too. So I just played Patapon and slept my way to the metro.

Dito na-addict sila kuya grabe… yung gellatin balls na galing sa maliit tapos lalaki pag binabad sa tubig!

Medyo insecure ako sa hair niya…